Paul Cockayne – 07791 970406 – paulcockayne3@gmail.com

This is a sort of counselling “blog” to give you a flavour of how I work. You can find more information about me by clicking one of the links above.  This blog was previously at http://www.pcrc.berkshire-website.co.uk where historical entries from November 2008 can be found

Part of being in a loving relationship is about looking out for our partner, being there when they need us, helping them through bad times.

However, sometimes these natural wishes to care for our partner can work against us.  For instance, suppose that in your relationship it is agreed that the man will look after the money side of things.  In an effort to do a good job, the man may want to make sure that the woman doesn’t have to worry about money at all.  This can mean that the man doesn’t tell his partner if there are money troubles, maybe working overtime to earn a bit more, maybe taking out a loan to tide them over.  And so out of a desire to look after his partner, he now has secrets from her (“better not to worry her about that”) and rather than the relationship being an equal one where there is a financial partnership, the man can find himself in a position where he wants to control the money and control the woman’s spending.

Counselling can help by revealing secrets like these in a safe way, and by helping the couple to manage various areas in their relationship in different ways that work better for both of them.